Ugly Racists

I was thinking about it this morning and I’m pretty sure I’ve never seen an attractive racist person. I’m not trying to make some fancy statement like “a person’s personality can be their most attractive feature” because that’s stupid. Kate Upton could walk around screaming terrible things about Asians and guys would still Google her name 10 times a day hoping for nip slips. Leonardo Dicaprio could club baby seals for fun and bang Blake Lively at the same time. Your personality can get a pass in a lot of situations if your face brings the heat.

If you go to YouTube and type “I hate (any race here)” you’re going to see a much higher percentage of misshapen heads and eyes that are too far apart then you’re going to see on the street. I’m guessing that less then 5% of the US population has a forehead that is way too goddamn big (I’m a member of this group; legit five head) but if you based your data ONLY on people doing YouTube rants you’d probably think the number was closer to 30% - 40%. You’d assume that everyone was eating lead paint when they were children.

I’m guessing the reason that most racists are unattractive is because they have a lot of time to worry about that shit. Hot girls don’t have time to think about how minorities are ruining the country; they have to go pick up their hot friends and go get drunk on a yacht all day. Attractive guys don’t want to sit in bunkers and worry about immigrants not learning English; they’re pre-gaming before they head to the bar where they’re going to flirt with girls. All the attractive people think that life is pretty good so why would they dislike any particular race? The only people that have time to work on their crazy are the ones that have an empty dance card. Everyone else is busy.

Ugly Racists are buster. Keep coming back.